Sunflower Heart Exercise
When I was about 20, I obsessively collected books of mindmapping, positive thinking and psychology in general.
I read the following exercise in one of these books, and even though now I can’t remember the author or the title, the exercise stuck with me because it proved to be so efficient:
Whenever you have hard or difficult feelings towards someone, or an arguement that is seemingly not going to be resolved any time soon, imagine a giant sunflower on the other persons chest right where his/her heart would be.
I sometimes like to go even further and imagine a sunflower of both of our hearts. You might think that such an imaginary game will not solve any serious problems but please, give it a try.
The thought behind this exercise is that people can’t seem to hear other people’s point of view when they argue. The more passionately and the louder they defend their point of view, the further they go from understanding someone else.
When you imagine a beautiful sunflower where your opponent’s heart is, you actually take the time and see something beautiful in them. Even though you still might feel like you can’t listen to what they have to say, you will choose your words more wisely because you will fear to break or ruin that fragile flower that is their heart.
You might think that arguing with others have nothing to do with loving yourself so let me just tell you, when you are heated with anger, you don’t love yourself, when you feel like you hate the world or the situation you are in, you don’t love yourself, when you blame others for things not going the way you wanted them to go, you don’t love yourself.
You love yourself when:
- you can listen fully to what others have to say
- you forgive
- you walk away from conversations that are one sided
- you accept that you have done everything you could and now it’s not up to you any more, how things will turn out
Give it a try next time you find yourself in an arguement and let me knoe how it went!
Links to previous days:
Day one: https://chloedotillism.wordpress.com/2020/05/12/30-day-challenge-how-to-love-yourself-day-1/ day 2: https://chloedotillism.wordpress.com/2020/05/13/30-day-challenge-love-yourself-day-2/ day 3: https://chloedotillism.wordpress.com/2020/05/14/30-day-challenge-how-to-love-yourself-day-3/ day 4: https://chloedotillism.wordpress.com/2020/05/16/30-day-challenge-how-to-love-yourself-day-4/ day 5: https://chloedotillism.wordpress.com/2020/05/18/30-day-challenge-day-5-the-law-of-attraction/ day 6: https://chloedotillism.wordpress.com/2020/05/19/30-day-challenge-day-6-do-you-ever-think-youre-being-thought-about/